Mailbag: Ask Sage (11)

Let’s dig right in, shall we?

Hey there, I think you did answer your own question. But let’s look at this for just a minute.

First, I wanna say, I hate to think of it as ‘can a Wiccan do this’ or ‘can a Wiccan do that’ Because that makes it sound like someone has to give us permission or something. It’s just a little too authoritarian for me, you know?

I like to look at it more like this– you do what you do. Follow the God(s) you believe in, etc., as you believe them to be. That’s how it should be first and foremost.

So the question then becomes, is what you’re doing something that can be considered Wicca, or not? Like, does it fit the Wiccan religion? Does it make sense within a Wiccan religious context, because obviously some things do and some things don’t.

Wicca, being a fertility religion in which things like gender and polarity play an important role, simply begs for duality. For some, that is seeing a Supreme Being as having both male and female qualities. For others, that is seeing at least one Goddess and at least one God. And others are polytheistic. But the key to the view of the divine in Wicca is in its duality (and complementary duality at that, such as the Yin/Yang, rather than conflicting duality, as in God/devil).

Even a hard polytheistic Wiccan, however, can believe in many Gods but focus a relationship on one, or two, or on a specific divine pair, etc. Just being Wiccan doesn’t necessarily mean you have to actively worship the multitudes of deities.

So really it depends on what you mean on worshiping ‘one’… and I guess it depends on how you define that ‘one’. There is definitely room here for henotheism or kathenotheism; although one might argue monotheism or even monolatry extends beyond any borders that can be defined as Wiccan territory.

Ah, risks of Witchcraft. That is a huge concern for many. I guess there’s a lot of mixed information out there. A lot of the rumors and religious folk and horror movies would have you believe it’s potentially deadly; a lot of other Pagan-friendly websites would have you believe it’s completely innocent or harmless.

I would say somewhere in-between. I don’t think it’s some big satanic/demonic trap for your soul– and in my experience, it’s never been like what Christians always warned me it would be like. But at the same time, people white-wash it, as if it’s never a threat, and I don’t think that’s completely true either.

It’s working with natural energies, and nature can be dangerous. Like working with fire or electricity or working in water. Natural forces are powerful, even when you’re just trying to harness them a little bit. So we always have to use caution and be careful.

Almost anything in life is risky– going out and crossing the street, taking a shower, cooking a meal. Witchcraft is no different. But the idea that the hounds of hell will be unleashed upon you to feast on your soul, yadda yadda yadda… no, not so much, lol.

Okay… wow. Crazy people out there. I wouldn’t really listen to anything he says about his religions, his life missions or his past lives. Sounds like an attention-seeking nutter to me. But nutters can be dangerous. And the fact that he’s figured out how to manipulate your wife is obviously dangerous territory here.

Tread carefully with her… don’t give her a reason to think she needs to cut you off and turn to him; if she feels that connected to him, don’t make her feel like she has to choose between you & Mr. Supposedly Wonderful over there. Because in her state of mind you might not like the choice she makes, particularly if he’s adept at magic and working spells on her.

Keep the lines of communication open; ask questions and keep her talking about it. But not questions that really defy him so much as let her talk, and you listen, and when you see inconsistencies or absurdities, point it out to her. Encourage her to share with trusted friends and family, too, as well as other religious leaders that she respects (or find leaders in religions she respects).

You might also invest in doing some research on this guy… see what he’s got in his past. Also it might be a good idea, if you can talk her into it, to go to counseling together.

That’s the mundane things you can do; now, for the magical things I’d work on…. if you or someone you know is adept at magic, do spells to reveal himself to her– his manipulativeness, his lies, his true intentions. You also might want to convince her to do an uncrossing (don’t even bring him into it, just talk her into you think she needs one, suggest you both do one). This will break any magical grip he’s managed to get on her.

At that point I’d work on spells to banish him– I’d wait to loosen his grip on her first, though. If you just try to banish him at first, she might go with him.

Realistically, I wouldn’t use spells to bring someone back… it doesn’t matter how much love you feel for her. When people want to go, you have to let them go.

It’s sad, but it’s just a fact. It doesn’t really matter what you think is best for her (in fact, it’s going to be hard for you to be objective, given your feelings). She has to be able to decide what she thinks is best for her, and what she wants.

Love spells just don’t make for good, healthy relationships. There’s too much of an imbalance of power. It’s more like slave/master relationship (and I know some people are into that, but I don’t mean in a good way, because it’s an unwilling slave). When you keep someone in emotional bondage like that, they’re not going to be the person you wanted.

In your situation, I don’t advise casting love spells on her. I would say you’re time and effort would be better put toward casting spells on yourself to help you let go. I’d recommend meditation and pathworking to understand what void it is you have that you’re looking to fill. And after working on yourself, cast spells to meet compatible potential mates to choose from.

That may not be the answer you’re looking for in your position right now, but I think it’s much better answer than casting spells to manipulate someone and force them to be with you when they make it clear they feel the desire and/or need to take a different path for themselves.

Love that movie, ‘The Last Keepers.’ I highly recommend it. One of the few movies that features a Pagan family, and paints modern Pagans in a positive light.

The only explanation I have for the supernatural scenes, though, is that it’s a fiction movie. And they made it up, as fiction creators are known to do. While they did draw from realistic Pagan religions in terms of Goddess worship and ritual, the whole thing about prophecies, supernatural powers and such are from fiction. We can’t elevate giant blocks of wood and make them fly through the air, we can’t start fire by pointing a finger, etc.

While I personally believe that yes, there are people with psychic abilities and psychic healing abilities, it rarely is in real life as it is portrayed in films.

Thanks everyone for the questions! I will get to another batch in a couple of days. Until then, bright blessings!

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